Rose, if you do that and she asks you where you were that you did not answer? Just tell her that you often drift off to sleep and you turn your ringer off at night so you don't hear the phone if it rings. That way she will get it in her mind that you turn your wringer off and you are not just ignoring her. And, you could actually turn your ringer off too so you don't get bothered.

Also, you can tell her that you turn your ringer off when you want quiet or to nap or want to sit and watch a movie undisturbed. This way when she calls and you don't want to talk to her you can choose to not answer and you won't feel guilty about it. Also, it's actually therapeutic for you in that you are not on call for anyone because it can take a while to regain your own sense of space again after all the caregiving where your time was dictated by another's needs.

I don't think it's necessary to discard an aquaintance you have enjoyed spending time with as you have described. I think that where you are right now in your healing is that you are slowly rediscovering yourself again and you like to have control over that and feel you have your own space for a change and that your time is your own now to do what you please.

Believe it or not Rose, when you corrected me? That is also progress because you were able to define something about yourself that's very important, that's a gain.