I started for a terrible reason. I started at 18 because I was so utterly and completely miserable that I figured anything that would help shorten my life would be a blessing. I smoked on and off fir awhile and quit immediately when I found out I was pregnant. I didn’t go back right away but I did eventually go back. I’ve struggled off and on in the last couple of years to quit as it really bothers my fiancé. I turned to vaping in January and only picked up a pack of cigarettes during my terrible depression in the spring when juul pods were banned for sale in my state. I am able to order them online however so I still vape. I am addicted to nicotine of course but I have found I can go without if my shipment is late. But if I get stressed out I’m back to them in an instant. It seems it’s the actually act that I find soothing. The hand to mouth action and the inhale that regulates my breathing. I do believe I will never pick up an actual cigarette again. The mere smell disgusts me now. But it’s going to take me awhile to pluck up the courage to quit vaping. There’s always going to be some scenario that will stress me out and I will have to handle it without vaping. That in itself is stressful.