A black-hole

I knew what I had to do to be okay for a lifetime and simply didn't do it.
Now life is gone
I'm a Ghost

In the first half of my twenties I was a narcisist and Aware of how much i was Wasting behaving like that
Then at 25-26 i was a depressed narcisist and escape confrontations

I can't Believe it
I had everything back then. I just had to be' true to people, to my lost loved one. But I didn't. Instead i engaged in every possible addictiv ********.