I am actually wondering if he and I could remain as friends - not close friends, distant friends. I've talked about on here my concerns about our local music scene and about seeing him at the smaller music venues when COVID passes and when things open up again. It will be SO uncomfortable and awful to have to avoid him at all costs. And I want to be able to go to all music events - I really don't want to avoid my scene, my larger social circle of friends, and him. A part of me cannot wrap my brain around being friends after all he's done. But then again, we could possibly given our nice conversation last week. I don't know. I know it's completely up to me to decide. After the news of my ex fiance, I do know this: I do not want to hold onto bitter feelings for years to come. I did that with my ex fiance, and I wasted a whole lot of precious energy and time doing so. Perhaps a part of my healing involves being on friendly terms with him now. I can still uphold boundaries. It's something I am considering at least.