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sunrise said:
Pachyderm, you seem to learn a lot about yourself from these less than perfect interactions with your therapist, and make connections to origins of your current behavior in your childhood. So it sounds very valuable.

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Valuable but not at all easy. I still have a hard time seeing the difference between the present and the past. I feel that I may succumb to the temptation to "go under" as I think happened to me at that time. It really feels dangerous.