She was both St. Michael and Lucifer. She was my physical trainer when I was still searching for myself. She made me physically and (I thought) psychologically strong. I became dependent upon her for many things. Love, compassion, and a feeling of wholeness. When I was diagnosed and started meds, she reacted strongly to my change in personality. I was no longer dependent on her. My therapist and I have discussed how I used to have dependent personality disorder, but now I have a strong sense of self. She died of cancer and I had broken our ties many years ago. Yet, she still haunts my life. She made me stronger, yet made me weaker. I'm still processing how I am feeling. Has anyone else had such a presence in their lives?