Today was extremely difficult. I went into a panic when RS put his arm around me last night and it never went away. I’ve been in a vicious anxiety attack all day long. I couldn’t concentrate for **** today. I was able to take care of my student but I was supposed to do work after that as it was a half day for the student and I could only get the bare minimum done. I’m not even sure I did it right.

I debated texting my therapist and begging for another session this week but she said Tuesday she doesn’t have anything after four. I’m still debating though. Since it’s virtual I could really take any time and just go to my car for an hour. I don’t have to leave the premises. Someone else could take care of my student for a short time.

This is just waaaay out of the realm of my control. I have no coping skills for this. I’m used to depression, mania, mixed. I know what to do. But I have never been subject to this amount of panic. I’ve tried looking up online resources but I don’t even know where to start.

I don’t know. I guess there’s no harm in asking. If she says she can’t then I’ll just have to hold on till Tuesday.

Edit: I asked and she can see me at 10am tomorrow. Hopefully my supervisor doesn’t give me ****.