So.. I’ll say I do not have a diagnosed eating disorder. I do not think I have one but I am certainly in the unhealthy thoughts and patterns phase .

I had COVID in November. A “moderate” case which on its own would have been manageable . However my husband was in the ICU for ten days so I had many nights of insomnia worrying about him —jumped back to work too soon doing telemedicine , never really got a chance to properly heal.

I think that is partly why I’ve had extended GI symptoms .at first persistent nausea and loss of appetite . Now it’s more reflux and IBS symptoms . This has been ongoing for over two months and it’s starting to affect my psyche for two reasons: I’m afraid that what I eat is going to make me sick ...so I’m becoming food averse
The second piece of the puzzle is I lost five pounds when I was already at my healthiest/lowest weight in my adulthood . (I’m on the light side to start with) Pretty much if I lose one more pound I’m “underweight”
But I am really liking how I look right now. I’ve started in exercising again so my muscles are starting to get toned muscles back on a small frame... I’m spending more time on dressing up for work, etc.

So food averse because I’m worried it will make me sick, but now being happy with the results until low calories have caused . I know being underweight is not a goal I want to aim for especially because I can’t donate blood at this weight and that’s very important to me. More intense exercise is also something I value. And I know the calorie math cannot sustain my workouts for long with what I am eating now.

I’ll stress again the physical GI symptoms were the trigger. I have no history of body dysmorphia/food fixations/weight worries. But now regardless I’m left with this psychological debris.

Has anyone else started down the path of disordered eating secondary to a physical illness like this?