I woke up in another complete disastrous panic. I couldn’t breathe by the time I got to work. I had to wait for my supervisor to get in and she saw that something was seriously wrong immediately. I mean, she is the school psychologist, so...anyway I didn’t go into any details but just said I was having “a severe mental health issue” and I absolutely needed to speak to my therapist at 10am. She agreed immediately and even said I could go back to my car for awhile to collect myself. I sat in there for about a half hour listening to music and vaping, which I know is bad for me but whatever. I went back in for an hour and then signed on to see my therapist. I described my issue. She gave me some specific skills to use to help “ratchet down” the panic but she said that the only way this is going to end for good is to work through the trauma. Which I know. I just wish I didn’t have to do it.

Anyway at least on the bipolar front everything is copacetic. My brother and SIL are selling their house and having showings so I agreed to take in their cat until they can find a new house for themselves. Or at least for now, because we all know how cats like to be loaded into carriers and moved into the car repeatedly. I’m hoping my cats will get along with him but if they don’t he can stay in the back room by himself and just chill out. My cats are very chill but they’ve never had another cat around and they’re five so it’s a toss up.

I also switched my son to full remote because hybrid just started last week and already four schools have had positive covid cases. It’s not fair to him to be constantly switching schedules.