Hi @Aviza.

I can relate very much to discovering that even many years down the track, forgiveness has not been realised. There are people I've been trying to forgive for a long time, and I really do want to forgive them for my own wellbeing, but recently after, as I said, many years of trying to forgive, it dawned on me that maybe I just simply cannot forgive them. It can happen that even though you really wish to forgive, you just can't, and no amount of trying and philosophizing is helping. Yes, so who gets to carry the pain? We do. So, the best thing I can do for myself is to be mindful and not dwell in it, to let go of hurtful thoughts as best I can. And maybe one day it'll just go away.

Sending a hug.