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As I understand your post, I honestly don't think you're any different than a lot of people. I can relate to much of what you wrote. If someone comes to my home without advanced notice, unless it's one of my (adult) children, my husband, or a dire emergency I will hide and not answer the door. No way. I'm not paranoid, I just have my own schedule and such...I don't want my life interrupted. In fact, if I do socialize I almost always plan to do so away from home. Plus, I think it's rude when someone shows up without planning in advance.
As for being in a store and having an employee follow me around asking blah-blah whatever, I can't stand it. Having worked retail myself and knowing other people who do, I do know that employees are told by management to do that with shoppers to "be friendly" - but more than that, to be sure people aren't stealing. Once an employee was following me through a store so obviously, chit-chatting, arranging the merchandise, it was annoying me so much that I looked at her and flat-out, calmly said, "I'm not going to steal anything, you don't have to follow me." She looked embarrassed and walked away.
Something I will add is that I am definitely less social and far more sensitive to having people around when I'm depressed and resenting my life.
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