OMG. Years ago, an old classmate of mine from high school told me her ex boyfriend raped her. If it's the guy I'm thinking of then I believe he was in my old tech ed class years ago. This guy was kind of a jerk. I had no idea he would do anything like. Like you, she didn't tell her family and sometimes she had triggers. If you can't tell those closest to you, then maybe you can go to a therapist especially one that handles relationships. Relationship abuse is never okay. I would also suggest pressing charges especially if it happened very recently.