Quote:
Originally Posted by Rive.
There has never been any outside contact in my therapy, with any of the therapists I saw.
Contacting one's T for any and all reasons deprives us of our sense of autonomy. How will we ever learn to self-soothe, cope with our emotions or even develop a sense of agency if the T is the first port of call.
Likewise, the time between weekly sessions is for personal processing and integration work. Seeing T several times also prevents that from happening and instead, develops dependence on T. I am always shocked at how permissive Ts are here. Scarily so as it seems to foster dependence rather than autonomy and independence.
And yes, I am very aware that this is not a popular opinion.
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The thing for me is, maybe at one point (a couple years ago), my therapist (or former marriage counselor) was the first port of call. But now? I try various other things first. I'll talk with friends or my husband. I might try something to distract myself, like listening to music, watching TV, cooking. Maybe I'd post on here. I might type up an email with thoughts, but not send it. So I've made progress in that I try various other things first. Contacting my T is just part of a list of coping mechanisms.
And I think that can be a good goal. Getting to a place where that's not the first thing a client tries. But sometimes, friends/family aren't available (or have their own struggles), distraction isn't helping, etc. I think at that point, reaching out to a T can actually be a healthy thing, especially for someone who has trouble asking for help. My T has actually said that he was glad I asked for what I needed at times, whether an email reply or extra or earlier session. Because that in a way shows growth.