I don't really feel as though I belong anywhere, that I don't fit in. I hope I can fit in here.

Mood is so low at the moment. Haven't seen anyone f2f (apart from OH) for 11 months, all MH appointments got cancelled and CPN reduced phone contact down to once a month, even though she knows I've been struggling with very dark thoughts. It looks as though 1st vaccinations for everyone 50 and above may not be until May, which means 2nd dose won't be until August. That's another 6 months of no in person contact. I don't know how I'm going to make it.