Well I spent the day sleeping to avoid being scattered, SHing and anxiety. I'm not understanding English right now. It just sounds like a bunch of sounds where I can pick out the individual word but can't make out the sentence but I'm responding properly. So that's good enough now. Still think my dogs going to die any second. I know this isn't "normal" problems. They have to leave tomorrow and I will be fully alone for at least an hour. I'm already hearing my name being called when everyone is sleeping. I still have two weeks before I meet my new T and two and a half weeks before seeing pdoc. I usually ease T's into my brand of crazy. Scheduling didn't even WANT to give me weekly appointments. So I have to convince her I'm safe for almost 2 weeks between our first meeting and our second. In general it takes months to get me to start letting down my guard. I'm worried I'll scare her off, my paranoia will scare me off, or not knowing me she'll recommend IP. How do I sugar coat this enough to get my point across but not alarm her? I am already worried she'll want to hospitalize me. I'm trying really hard to be safe because I don't want IP.