I’m so sorry this happened to you too.

It’s never occurred to me to bring someone in to help us out. Is that a thing?

I can’t imagine that there’s anything you could have done differently. That really stood out for me here. That sounds like the kind of thing a parent says about their child (“how could I have missed that she was high all the time?”) not something a client says about their therapy relationship. You say that when you’re the person in the more powerful, responsible role.

But I’ve been feeling that way too: what have I done wrong? How have I messed up? I sent her an email apologizing for having been too blaming toward her recently. I meant it when I wrote it and no doubt I was too blaming.

But if you’d told me last year at this time (OMG I could start many sentences that way lol) that I’d be so abjectly apologetic toward T in an unconscious effort to get her to like me again because she’d been so offended or overwhelmed that I had not been entirely fair in expressing anger toward her? I would absolutely not have believed you. I would have said that I felt secure enough in the relationship and that her ego was so clearly strong enough that such a thing would never be necessary.

And yet here we are.