Hi Sidony,

Reading this I wonder if it's not so much that you are shy--though you might be that--but that you are/feel misunderstood. I have felt this way in groups and group therapy settings. I'm not particularly shy, though I have my moments.

What stood out for me in your post was the concern you had about how your words are being perceived or the way in which you believe your words are being perceived. For me I haven't felt very known by many people. To say something that is misconstrued or that I don't know has been received as intended can be stressful to the point of becoming silencing. It has been helpful for me to work through some of that with my individual T who can validate my need to be seen for who I am and can therefore work with me to diminish some of the anxiety I experience when I worry that I am lying or exaggerating when I am, in reality, just expressing my truth.

I just wanted to say that I hear you. I haven't done group therapy for quite a while now. There are parts of it that are helpful for me and parts that aren't so helpful for me. I'm choosing right now to focus on individual therapy. I hope that as you move forward you find the right balance for you and that you find ways to create room for your truth--whether or not people can hear it and regardless of with whom you choose to share it.

~doubtful