What? You bought him 2 valentine cards and he gifted them (i.e. something he didn't even buy or choose for you) to you?!

I don't find you petty. You are thoughtful re your gifts to him. He can afford to gift himself a BMW, it wouldn't kill him to learn to be equally thoughtful (not in terms of buying something expensive but in terms of thinking of what you care about / like and making an effort for his love).

Sorry but I find it bull to make excuses for him saying he hasn't been taught to be considerate etc. You don't need to be taught that! He has a brain. He can self-teach, if need be. He just seems lazy and taking the easy way out... which, understandably, does not make you feel treasured.

It's not ungrateful to say, give 80% and receive a measly 20%!