Dear T,
I think we need to talk about how you've taken on a considerably larger number of clients than you'd prefer to have right now, because of the mental health need in the area. Part of me feels guilty for taking up 3 slots when you could be helping more people. Part of me also feels guilty for taking up that amount of your time, because maybe if I dropped to twice a week right now, you wouldn't add another client, and then you'd have an extra hour to yourself each week. But then part of me also hates that you're less available now, like for extra sessions or responding to email. Like part of me feels like, "Hey, I was here first!" And then there's the part that worries you're going to get burned out seeing this many clients and either provide less-quality care or just suddenly be like, "OK, I need to take 2 weeks off starting now." Well, and I worry that your personal health and well-being will suffer, too, even if it doesn't more directly affect your clients (including me). You just look so tired lately. I hope you're OK and doing enough self-care.

So, yeah, those competing thoughts in me. Plus the fact that my rate is supposed to go back up to what it was on March 1. Do I mention that? Do I ask for an extension or some middle ground between that and my regular rate for a month or two? Would that be terribly selfish of me? But then if you're seeing a bunch more clients, you're also getting more income (though I feel guilty thinking that...). Like, could I just get one more month at that rate, so I feel better about doing 3 times a week (from a financial perspective), while we see what happens with schools, in the hopes that, if things go as planned, it takes a huge weight off of me? And gives me more time to practice self-care? Or do I just suck it up and pay the higher rate because you deserve it, and I figure out financially how long I can do 3x a week? I mean, it's not a case of whether I could technically manage...it's how much I'd have to give up to do that. And that means I need to figure out exactly how important/vital this is to me vs. other things.


The other thing is, you said a month ago how if I drop to twice a week, then realize I do still want/need 3x, you'd be able to fit me in. But I worry if that's still the case? I suppose I could just ask you... I guess I could go with some sort of middle ground and do 2 regular and 1 half session a week. Maybe I try that in mid-March? I think I need to talk about all of this with you, but when I've asked before about transitioning from 3 to 2, you said you weren't sure how it would be best to do that. But maybe we can talk about it again?

Love,
LT