Mickey, this is real.

It was played off to me for a long time on my side that it was in my head, can't I see the good, can't I see how others are trying, why couldn't I just see. the positive.....

But, when it is year, after year, after year, and when you DO travel to see people, and they stick to their regular plans, or even accept invites from other people while we are these, so that me, wife, and kids, are ALONE in a family member's home when they've gone to a dinner or a party at someone else's.... More than once.... You start going, "OK, I've been doing the heavy lifting for this relationship, you can do your part. You are on notice that I need you around more, my kids need these connections, and I need to see you step up and try harder with us," and my siblings and parents just don't.

When you call people and say, my kid is sick, my wife is sick, we could really use some support, and they, instead, don't just go to, but HOST a party for other family members that we couldn't attend due to serious illness. Twice. You start thinking to yourself....

"You know, I really don't think it is me. I really do think it IS you guys who are the problem. I think we've been pushed aside too much."

So you stop..... And you just don't hear from anyone any more.

If it was just me, I'd keep taking it, just to have extended family connections.

But I won't have my kids grow up thinking they are less important than someone else. No way. They're good kids.

RDM