When making the commitment to stop using alcohol, that has to come first. You have to learn how to now structure your life around not drinking instead of your life being structured around the alcohol. At first the physical challenge is the major hurdle and then after that it’s the daily psychological that is the constant challenge. This means learning how to face all kinds of challenges without using the alcohol as a crutch.

Your wife consuming alcohol in front of you is selfish on her part and disrespectful of what your effort to learn to live your life sober really means. You can’t expect her to give you the support you need as she is clearly prioritizing her resentments that you had a problem in the first place. This typically is what contributes to divorce in many relationships. And if that is the case then so be it because you need to stop drinking for your health at this point.

Please know that when you slip and drink your body can easily become dependent again right back to the level you were at before you stopped. So it’s really not the case where just a little bit will be ok.

This is what a sponsor is for that agrees to be there to help when you get the urge to sit with you and remind you why you need to be strong and keep trying. This is why AA can be so helpful as you have access to others who know what it’s like and can give you the support you need as you work at living your life without using alcohol.

You need support, not shaming which is something others who work at it understand. It’s good that you are working with a therapist. It would help if you found a support group too. That way you are around others that are more supportive to someone just starting to learn how to stay sober.