i agree with the wise and wonderful Skeezyks and Mountaindewed. If this is something that is bothering you definitely seek some help and try to contact a therapist who has at least some experience with these situations or seems to know how to handle it appropriately. Sending many safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @peemybed, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!