Alright, that last post was before i read your response. If by being assertive about your needs to your doctor leads them to hate you this is not a place you want to be. Anyplace that your assertive about your needs worth being a patient at doesn’t respond with hate. Great job btw still trying meds. It’s not easy but your doing it. Forming a relationship with your psychiatrist or therapist which is congenial, positive and progressive is very sdvisable in this situation. No worries man, keep trucking til you find that person that clicks. I know your angry, but your serious about it I see now. You’ll make it, because your trying to do the work. Hope’s a tricky thing when your in hell. This is a journey that you sound like your onboard.