Wow, this is a complex situation.

My take - I believe you do genuinely love her and did not have intent to hurt her. However, from what happened to her in her past, it seems her trust has been betrayed and she is very fragile(?) in terms of trusting others. This is understandable as she is merely trying to protect herself from feeling hurt.

The accident did not help. You did support your cousin and lied... this seemed to be what eroded her trust in you. Her take: you should have been truthful throughout but instead, your cousin was the one who had your allegiance. I hear how this changed afterwards but it seemed 'too little too late'. The hurt has already been done.

Afterwards, it did seem like an unfortunate series of events e.g. abortion and her perceiving your reactions as wanting to back out / not wanting the baby, you having a panic attack and crying to her / being 'needy' in wanting her company or to be included in her family... This latter point is tricky as her dad seems very controlling and the way she sees it, how could she include you when he/dad is mistreating her (threatening to divorce her mom). It felt like she was between a rock and a hard place and saw your tears and need as further pressure.

I am not saying you are in the wrong. Nor is she.

But I see many difficulties in re-establishing the trust. I do agree with her that you guys might be better off with time apart. IF you could individually work on your issues, this may help any potential future (whether together or not).

She still seems to have issues from the past (before you). The accident did not help and what she perceived from the subsequent events (i.e. baby, being included in her family circle, spending time with her) she did not feel you were supportive. She is still in a hard place - her dad, pressure and control from him, abuse from him(?) and zero friends. So, yes, I think it would be difficult to have a relationship without similar issues cropping up and with predominant lack of trust.

Personal work (i.e. therapy) might help. Otherwise, I honestly can't see how the two of you can work. There seems to be too many issues or obstacles.