I know. I hear you. It's like when I applied for disability. The more one has worked, the more money disability pays. How does that make sense? Obviously, had I been able to work full-time I wouldn't need disability. So I ended up receiving only a few hundred dollars each month, rather than enough to at least partially live on.
And sometimes (not always, but sometimes) mental health care providers are the least considerate of all. My heart goes out to you FluffyD, it really does.