I am in one of those roller coatser marriages... where he cycles thru between being the greatest husband ever to being the emoitional/verbal tyrant.... So many reasons float to surface:

1. Feeling like a failure
2. Spiritual/Religious reasons
3. Would life be any better if I did leave
4. Do I want to put all the work of a divorce
5. He has just as much reason to leave.... I am no peach and have put him thru a lot of hell...
6. Financial
7. Is it what I want really...
8. Is it what I need really..
9. But I love him, just dont like him so much
10. Would the kids be better off if we stay or go...
11. Hope it will get better someday
12. who else would put up with me and my mental health issues

I do not know what my breaking point would have to be in order for me to actually go thru with it..Esp... since I have and can be just as much a part of the destruction of our relationship as he is...

((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs to all on the roller coaster))))))))