@openeyes You've been so interactive and helpful during this trying time. All your posts have not only helped me see things from a different perspective but also made me realize that I need to find a way to move on. I barely got out of bed last week, and this week I'm starting to force myself to return back to "normal" life. I think it's been so difficult for me in part because it seems like this is easy for him, maybe he's also struggling, but he is better able to hide it.

It's also hurtful that he dropped our relationship so quickly and confidently after ten years and so many good memories. Everyone around me is shocked, my family and our friends keep saying they think we will get back together. But these false hopes and other people being as surprised as me is why it's so hard for me to wrap my mind around this. I know he's not cheating on me, so that means he left me because he doesn't love me. And that is really hard to accept. It has made me feel like maybe I was a bad partner, maybe I didn't pay enough attention to him, or didn't catch the signs of him slipping away sooner. And I spent all week beating myself up for ruining our relationship, without even knowing what I did wrong because he has been ignoring me. But your messages and wisdom have made me realize, although I may have played a part, it's also possible that he is struggling internally. He's not a communicative man, and definitely doesn't know how to talk about his feelings. So maybe it's not my fault, or at least not fully. And I can't force someone to love me, even if I love them, so the only thing I can do for myself is try to move on. And hopefully one day I'll find someone who thinks I'm worth fighting for.