Every since being diagnosed with mental health issues in my late 40s (anxiety and depression--I also have diagnosis that were "put into" my VA health record of panic disorder (I have experienced this on and off) and in 2018 "bipolar II in full remission" was entered--though I have considered the possibility since coming to PC in 2016 and sometimes ask my therapists and psychiatrists about it. Anyways, I have had times in my life when I am talkative/energized and times I have been depressed. I am still unsure if I am bipolar, I say this only to provide some background to the discussion.

I have always felt like there are some mental health diagnosis that I feel unsure about and I think sometimes people can be misdiagnosed--especially when done over a short period of time. Plus I have the impression that some providers just look at patient's former diagnosis and go with that given that it can be hard to diagnose patients properly (patients could not be forthcoming and many conditions have some of the same symptoms). Also we have all behaved badly at least once in our lives and many mental health issues start because of other bad behaviors or our own. And perhaps some mental health issues can be temporary if given the right treatment or circumstances.

Anyways, relationships are complex and it can be hard to sort out where behaviors are coming from. I do a whole lot of listening to my husband now. There is no doubt that he is much more talkative than I am now and when he has asked if he is too talkative--I have said it is OK--my POV is that a good partner tries to be a good listener. Not that I am never talkative. I still can be. I also have a problem with restating the same thing sometimes. It is something I am really trying to stop myself from doing. However, whenever I have a slight amount of excitement in my voice or am slightly talkative--my husband asks if I have taken my medication. Lately, it seem like he asks everyday (and perhaps more than one time a day--I don't count, a long ago stopped trying to figure out who is "crazy" or might be lying by monitoring/writing down things people say--this was making me crazy. However, I did relate to what was said at minute 2:26 of the following video: "person may say "You need to calm down, is there something wrong with you, maybe you need to see a therapist because you sure get some strong emotional reactions..." He still reacts to me this way sometimes even though I don't feel upset much anymore and I don't react much to when he gets upset anymore. Trusting in God and leaving it to him to judge people's intentions and hearts has calmed me down inside. I did make an appointment to see my old therapist (which I have not seen since prior to this whole Covid thing) but I actually envision myself speaking to her about how far I have progressed in regards to my mental health. I feel like I am stable and making better judgements. Perhaps my H is just shell shocked about everything that has happened in our family during the past few years but just wanted to put it out there that it can be so confusing to distinguish between bad behavior and mental health issues. The one thing I am not confused about is me. I still have things I need to work on but don't we all? What do you think?