I got into some messy intense rupture/trauma reenactment with my primary therapist almost exactly two years ago. It was terrible, and it was so disappointing that she should have seen what was happening and stopped it, but she didn't or she couldn't. I ended up seeing a different trauma therapist who had some other techniques that my primary therapist doesn't have (mainly DBT and EMDR but there was a little IFS in there too). The plan was always to hopefully work things out with my primary T and go back to her, and in the meantime, the secondary T and I processed what was going on with my primary T and how the issues were reactivating old traumas. I saw just the secondary T for several months and then have been seeing them both for over a year now. I'm finally getting back to where I feel solid enough to just see the primary T, although I could still see going back to the secondary T for more EMDR as things come up for me, especially once we're back in person.

It's awful when the person you trust seems untrustworthy and when the forces of relational trauma are pulling you all over the place so you can't even think straight. There was nothing shady or unethical going on with my T either but for a long time I was unsure whether I could go back because of how she made me feel. But my secondary T (who used to work with primary T) believed in my relationship with primary T enough that I was eventually able to see that the relationship is worth salvaging. So that's my story that's sort of related. I hope it turns out well, but it's still too early to say.