That makes me feel pretty lucky that my Pdoc and the paramedics had a milder reaction. In my case the OD happened at home, but my wife didn't really recognize what was going on so she just kind of dragged/carried me to bed. She said I could hardly walk but I don't remember anything from that, I don't even remember losing consciousness. All I remember is taking all those pills and listening to some music and then nothing.

After that I was knocked out for about 24 hours. Then she realized what was up and called an ambulance, but by the time they arrived it was mostly over already, so they just asked me a couple of questions and left. They didn't hospitalize me or anything, and they didn't even take my meds away. I think if they had forced me to go to the hospital that would have been even more traumatic.

It makes me so ashamed now to think of it. I don't understand why I did that, I was just completely out of my mind with hopelessness and despair I guess. It's scary because when I'm in my right mind I wouldn't think myself capable of something like that. That's the only time in my life that happened, and I hope it never happens again. Even when I'm severely depressed I always have the restraint not to do anything stupid, except that one time. But in the worst case I guess that's all it takes...