This week as T and I (once again) talked through our differences he said to me: "You know, Miss, sometimes I think you forget that you are not the only one in this relationship with an emotional attachment." (SIGH)

As I thought about what he said I realized he was right. I think of myself -- and of course rightfully so because it is my therapy -- and my needs and my hurt and my pain. But there are two of us in the room each week. And, although he's my T, he is a person. And as such he has feelings.

As I move in and out of child state and the present, I have to remind myself of the complexities of the therapeutic relationship. After all, the relationship IS the work of therapy. And while we work through the excruciating pain of a lost childhood, we are also working through and towards wholeness in the now.

It's so complicated, and sometimes I have to let those complexities sit but I'm soothed by his willingness to state his emotional attachment.