I feel so ****ing childish for complaining and making a big drama out of this. I know I'm too sensitive but I can't help it, I don't know how not to be affected by the way my father treated me. I know it's difficult to understand from an outside perspective why I can't just be cool, ignore it and do my own thing. It's mostly the way he looks at me, coldly, full of disdain and disgudt, like I'm some vile insect that's stuck under his shoe and he can't get it off. It ****ed me up getting looked like that for years. I'm weird about people looking at me. Someone looked at me in a kind and friendly way and I started sobbing like an idiot. Maybe there's something wrong with my brain that makes me overreact.