Dear RR85,

Although I am not in your shoes, I experienced something quite similar to what you describe during a separation. I think your thoughts and feelings are totally understandable. The human brain is so complex and so mysterious and sometimes it takes us to a lot of places we don't want to go to. Wish I knew what to say that would help. But after a separation I developed a severe depression that left me hospitalized, so I am the last person on earth to offer advice. What a heartbreaking situation you are in. Hopefully others here will prove helpful to you. So very, very sorry I don't know how to be helpful!

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen