@WindsThatBlow much of what you say resonates with me as my ex left me mainly due to my mental health issues although she too had mental health issues. She preferred to blame me for her falling out of love with me. I totally get the heartbreak and especially the remorse - and at times the grief can feel inconsolable. But never doubt that you can be fulfilled and happy - acceptance and peace is achievable, be kind to yourself. Stay in touch!