I don't like me. I don't think you'll reply. You didn't reply to my list of triggers and my counter question even though you literally asked me what were the triggers and that particular question I don't understand.

It's not critical enough to go to the psych ER as I'm not actively suicidal. I know you've a lot of clients, and probably a bunch in worse shape who need you more.

I'll use my coping skills the best I can, don't want to give you more reason to feel our session frequency "reinforces dependency". I don't understand why so many of my friends local and overseas get to go weekly but not me even in a crisis. You wouldn't offer an earlier session, I'd have to ask. I don't want to because I think you'd say no. You'll say "that's an assumption" sure but you never ever saw me weekly no matter the crisis. Chronically passive SI and active SH was 2 weeks to.a month. Super dissociative the first session after a sexual assault? 2 weeks. And I don't want to overstay my welcome. Like you keep saying, I've seen you a long time, been at current frequency a long time. I have enough shame being an adult who feels so "needy".