I know a lot of people who have lost their Ts have said that they can't imagine starting over with someone else.

When ex-T left me, I rushed to find a new T. I knew I couldn't survive what I went through on my own. First T I saw was a flop. But second T I kept (for 6 years now). I didn't really start over. We worked on the abandonment of ex-T for pretty much 2 years straight (of course mixed with daily and/or relational issues). But it wasn't focused on my childhood. When T went on her maternity leave, I started with L. And again, we haven't really gone back to focusing on childhood stuff. It does come up in the context of my personal struggles.

My point is that you don't have to start over. You can pick up right where you are. You still have all the knowledge, experience, and lessons you have learned. There's no need to go backwards unless you choose to.

Please reach out to someone. Crisis lines, therapist, even the hospital if you need to. There is help out there and you don't need to be alone through this.