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donut_61 said:
My confusion is that I have been told that to a certain extent, the infidelities can be attributated to his illness.

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How can BPD be attributed to infidelity? I have BPD and that's not even an issue. I think whoever told you that is not an expert in the field.

I'm so sorry that you are having to deal with this. He is cheating on you...please don't put up with this. I know it's easier said than done but please do it for your own good.