Hi Paul,

I agree with PP Open Eyes. Just being there for her is what's important. My ex and I have two kids we are doing our best to co-parent, ages 8 & 10, through the beginning stages of our divorce. We have okay days and very bad days. We are looking for a family therapist hoping it will give us some ideas of how to cope and show we are trying our best. It's not going to be easy, hell parenting in general isn't easy, but as parents we do our best, tell them we love them and be in the moment with them as much as possible. With kids it's best to be upfront about everything as much as possible rather than ignoring it as we do with adults sometimes assuming they'll understand. Kids are figuring out the world and need us to guide them even when it's a bit foggy for us as well. My kids have been asking why can't you be together? You aren't fighting, so why can't you live together again? I don't get into the whys, but try to explain that people change and we're doing what we think is best for our family, even though we might be making our best guess and sometimes adults can make mistakes too. Ask for their input when making plans - at least the older child's - it makes them feel good when their opinion is heard. Hope this helps.