Im sorry if im all over the place. Im not high functioning. I require a cocktail of medications including 2 antipsychotic. I raised a son, kept my husband's relationship but outside that I have no successes. It's a successful day if I get up, make a shake, take my meds and make dinner. I avoid the hospital just nearly. I'm learning to identify it early and call my psychiatrist as soon as something is off. I'm trying to build a relationship with a therapist.

It seems like you may not have enough support out of the hospital. Are you able to see a therapist weekly? Are you seeing a marriage counselor? Is your wife seeing a therapist? So you'd have a check in with a professional 2x a week that can talk to your psychiatrist.