I woke up feeling so bad, like there are daggers coming at me from several directions. R, D, C, S... Those interpersonal relationships gone in the ditch torment me and I can’t fix them. I need to learn to cope with the awful, haunting feeling of all that disappointment and abandonment.

I don’t like the person I have shown myself to be for decades, chronically depressed from these issues mentioned above. And I don’t feel a strong sense of self. I did not engage in my own life choices and be the person I wanted to be, because I did not know who that was or how to do it, when I felt trapped in the relationships with those people who dragged me under.