Zguvpron

Hope you find consolation that these issues can happen to any grown adult. It's very sad to learn that your mother had other very serious problems.

Can understand what you are saying. As children we look to our parents to provide love and guidance. The level of guidance seems to be the most difficult to achieve. No parent should ever expect their child to be an exact copy of themselves. There is a saying "be yourself, everyone else is taken". You develop a unique personality which parents can also find difficult to accept.

My mother has a totally different attitude to my younger brother. It's nothing new and probably stems from her mother's attitude to her. It's part of growing up that brings these issues to the fore and how we choose to deal with them. As her only daughter, she's expected me to behave in a certain way. In other words, how she was brought up. Yes, I can be outspoken (not offensive) but I refuse to be trampled on. I've taken criticism and acted on it, where it was justified. Now in my mid-60s, I've decided enough is enough. Very often, a child can be accused of showing no parental respect because you don't follow their ideas to the letter.

It isn't too late for you to address this and find the rational guidance/ perspective to deal with these issues. Soul-searching can be upsetting, enlightening, educating and much more. As a friend recently said to me "by opening your mind, you've realised that there's so much to be explored".

I hope this makes sense