Im a person that always tries to stay in control, but on the other hand sometimes in social situations I just get into like this party girl character , its my escape, because when I'm "her" then I'm free to do what ever. sometimes i say really dumb things when I'm like that but i still feel like I'm more free then usual. its usually amplified when i drink and smoke and then i just go crazy. its fun, its how i escape from always trying to control everything that i do. but its also not who i really am at least not fully.