Individuals that are toxic/dysfunctional in some way only view things having value or are important only if they value or see things as important. When it comes to engaging they only do so when THEY need it and they don’t consider the needs of others. They lack respect and tend to send messages of how your needs are a burden. They tend to decide it’s a big deal when they do decide to give and that giving means expecting.

Your father decided that he could get your attention by suggesting you may get money from your uncles estate. What he is actually revealing however is that is something that would get HIS attention.

You try to consider other people’s needs and challenges and values but your father doesn’t know how to engage like that. He functions based on his own needs and uses techniques to make people think he cares but in reality his motivation is more about his own needs.