Reaching out to people who you have a sort of conflicted or messy past with to make you feel better is often a sure-fire way to invite trouble in. In order to change old patterns, we have to make clear changes, not go back to old times.

I’m going to be honest here. You may need to avoid men for a bit while you figure out how to be comfortable with yourself. You ended up in your marriage because, as I understand it, you didn’t want to be alone.

Work on finding you - independent of reliance on others to make you feel whole. When you really reach that place of personal comfort in yourself, at that point, you will be less likely to fall prey to people who are out to exploit your vulnerability.