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eskielover · May 03, 2021 at 10:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Have Hope

I did not reply to his last text and I don’t plan on it.

Good for this one....what about the next or the next? I personally would box up all his things left in your apartment & put them at a location of your choosing & send one final text telling him where he can get them, then immediately block him from any farther communication. That is what would truly make the statement you keep saying but not enforcing. Know that final blow is tough but if you don't do something truly forceful he will continue this even after the divorce.

Dang, I had just an acquaintance from high school & college that reconnected a few years ago on messenger/FB. He was actually annoying & I really didn't want to block, I just said I didn't want to communicate any more. He couldn't take that & kept trying. I ended up blocking him. Another acquaintance from high school sent me a happy birthday wish from the guy & encouraged me to reconnect with that guy. I said to tell him thank you but I would not open back up communication. Said NO with absolutely no remorseful feelings. Sometimes we have to get tough to make our own feelings known when they refuse to listen & end the insanity. Not easy but it actually has been getting easier the more practice at doing it I get. For me it came down to not being willing to tolerate certain behaviors & not being beholden to them for nice things they might have done in the past because NOW is all that really matters in reality.

Keep working on building your strength. It doesn't just happen overnight....takes time to develop along with the mind set that goes with it.

My "tolerance" mind set has become: "I will tolerate you having your thoughts & behaviors but I will not tolerate them infringing on MY life.....so GO, be however you want to be.....but not around me".