Hello, Alive99.
I speculate your experiences relate more to complex post-traumatic stress disorder than to generic depression.
You are your own experiment, and I applaud your watching another video to test your earlier observations. Perhaps, over time, the emotional triggers will weaken or evolve.
I hope you can discover what works for you. Learning what doesn't work can also be helpful.
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My dog  mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.
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