I think in absence of actual diagnosis many things are subjective. A lot of is an opinion.

Some people describe some horrendous unacceptable events in their lives and claim it’s all good and dandy while I am mortified to hear such things and some describe events as toxic while I think it’s just everyday routine that everyone deals with on a daily basis. .

So it all depends. Much of it is a perception. Unless of course it’s an actual diagnosis or something universally unacceptable, which are very few things.