Feeling exhausted and frazzled. I sold the piano. It went smoothly. There's not enough traffic on the Overeating/Binge-Eating forum to make it worthwhile posting there. So i guess you guys will hear all about my eating struggles.

I felt binge-y after selling the piano went so well. Felt like i deserved some food pleasure. But i don't allow my binge-food-of-choice in the house anymore and our little convenience store was closed, it has limited hours, thankfully, so i couldn't buy any.

I had saltines so i poured out a sleeve of them as a poor substitute. But i ate half and just said, No, this is wrong and made myself a plate of veggies with butternut squash soup dumped over them. It was good and i felt better than if i'd finished the plate of saltines.

I'm so weak tho, my body was aching from lifting the heavy piano and bending and stretching to get it set up in the hallway for the buyer to see if before he bought it. I don't allow strangers in my home. I had a neighbor attend the transaction too, for security.

But it went smoothly and i have $100 to put towards my dog's outrageous vet bill. The buyer was a dad of kids learning piano so it made me feel good to know how much fun they will have with it, it's really a charming and clever device. Sorta sad to say bye to it.

I took a hot bath for the first time in years, i almost never bath, to soothe my aching flesh. It's cut day in my benzo taper and i am going to hold steady for this week and not cut. This insomnia is getting ridiculous, i've been awake since 11:30pm yesterday. This is the first week in 12 weeks that i haven't cut.

Sorry to break my record but i've heard benzo tapers do get harder towards the end. I'm at 40% of my starting dose. I've made good progress but i think it's not going to be so easy from now on.

Today i am officially in menopause! It's been one year and one day. Ironic that it would be Mother's Day Eve that i had my last period. Fitting tho. Glad to say goodbye to it forever! I can wear light-colored pants now! Sorry guys if this is TMI.

Feeling depleted and exhausted and frustrated that my attempt to ignite the Overeating/Binge-Eating forum failed. Such a disappointment. Feel like i'm trying hard, but not getting anywhere.