Not sleeping between episodes I've been told by doctors is a sleep disorder - completely separate from my bipolar 2. I was told it would get worse as I got older, and he was right.

But there sure seems to be a hell of a lot of people with bipolar disorder with crippling insomnia regardless of their mood state -so

I would oversleep during depressive episodes until my early thirties, but otherwise I started struggling with insomnia as early as 6 years old. It got worse the older I got. But in my early 30s insomnia started to rule, regardless of mood. I did all the right things, and the long list of commonly and not so commonly known sleep hygeine became my way of life. NOTHING WORKED!

I spent 5 years addicted to zopiclone - the happiest most well rested and productive years of my life. And then zopiclone was no longer prescribed long term and I went into shocking withdrawl that lasted several months.

For the next 11 years, terrified of taking something addictive, and terrified of the weight gain and side effects of an anti-psychotic - my life grew smaller and smaller., and SI was a constant companion. Many times I went to work on only 45 minutes sleep. In those 11 years I did not sleep more than 4 hours a night - except on 2 occasions.

Two years ago I admitted defeat and asked to be prescribed seroquel. It was the best decision I"d made in years. I sleep now - a few days each month my peri-menopause overpowers the seroquel - but my life has vastly improved.

I never, never would have slept without medication. I did everything, everything under the sun to sleep without meds and nothing worked. I regret wasting so much time fearing the side effects of an AP.