june, if i am understanding your situation correctly, you are resented by stepchild and new wife for trying to disciple this child.

it is not your place to disciple her child.

that may be where you are having the problem.

try to be a friend, or responsible guardian, but leave the punishments (?), rather, consequences of his behavior up to his parents to handle.

you are a husband in that home ... that child was a package deal, so live with it, and find a way to enjoy life with them, lighten-up, and if anything, seek some way to humor the position you are in.

you cannot change this boy, but your behaviors and lifestyle will set an example.

is it a good one? or quick to find fault and judge?
are you envious? is the child?

family counselling is a good way to go - but looking to be stern and punish is walking down a dark, lonely street, which you might regret.

spoken from one who had a step-monster once - who was not good to me and definately not supportive. just judgemental and ridiculing, even hostile and violent ... not good for a young lady to experience.

check yourself first, before you check into others. ok?

peace,
nightbird